I love feedback.

That might be an unpopular opinion among writers. There are , after all, horror stories of having to submit to prescriptive “change this or else” lectures that suck the artistic soul out of a piece of work.

That is not what I’m talking about.

Maybe it’s the dramaturg in me, but as a writer, I love sitting and listening to thoughtful responses to and questions about my work. New insights. New perspectives. New sparks of creative insight.

It’s almost like Christmas.

I just sat through a feedback session for a screenplay I’ve been working on. The story is near and dear to my heart. It also is a source of great frustration.

Because all the basic, one line responses I’ve received from people who have read the story are the same. We love the story. We love the idea. It’s so interesting. Your characters are so intriguing.

But…

That but is usually followed up with some version of “I’m having a harder time connecting with the main character than I want.”

So. Freaking. Frustrating.

I, of course, love my character. I think she’s amazing. And I think her flaws are so important. So necessary. And I’ve been struggling with finding the answer to: How do I keep all of that while still creating connection with the audience?

Enter a great feedback session.

The greatest new insight that I received tonight was the idea that the main feeling they are currently feeling for the character is pity. While feeling pity is not, in itself a bad thing, when it is the strongest emotional reaction, it’s difficult to feel a deep emotional connection to them.

Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner.

The problem is, I don’t want to soften my character. She has issues that cause her to react badly in situations. She is, in truth, a bit off putting at times. I don’t want to lose that.

And I don’t have to. Again, the value of a great feedback session is that it allows you the space to explore different questions and problems. To test out hypotheses and reactions.

And the overwhelming reaction when I mentioned by struggle was… don’t. I don’t have to soften her or take away her glorious quirks. I just need to add… hope.

I’m excited about the chance to play with these new ideas. To see what breakthroughs happen. What new parts of the story are revealed.

All thanks to an inspiring feedback session.